The Man Who Missed His Beer

I was on my way to my dad's house when I met the Man Who Missed His Beer. It all started when my tire busted in the middle of a toll road.

Justin Trawick was loud in my speakers, threatening to shred the internal wiring of my granny-car's sound system if I turned the nob another fifteen degrees. His rough and spastic voice was telling me stories of an Untitled love that I was becoming increasingly jealous of.

"And I kiss your lips, and those lips taste as good as cherries on a warm Sunday afternoon," he sang. "And I ran my hands down every part of your body and the only way I can describe it is like that of the smooth touch of velvet."

I was singing along, trying to synchronize with his intoxicating voice, when I thought about what my church friends would say if they were in the car with me, or worse, my pastor. This song was erotic compared to songs about green pastures and Jesus, and everyone knows erotic=wrong. Would they blush? Would they think I was perverted, a bad christian? Were these questions the convictions of the Holy Spirit, or was all this all coming from my own self-conscious paranoia of being an inadequate Christian?

About to drown in my own thoughts, I quickly switched to worship music(just to be on the safe side). Not to be outdone by worldly, "eroctic" music, I ignored Justin's threat and turned the volume up.

But turning off Justin didn't turn off my internal conflict. One of the hardest controversial topics I've ever dealt with in my Christian walk is alcohol. Somewhere, somehow, I got the big impression that alcohol was equivalent to drugs. It was something bad people did, and something good Christians never, ever did. A good friend who is much more of a Christian than I ever could be, drinks, and I prejudicely counted that as his imperfect little quirk. He once described drinking like eating cake.

"Cake is good in small amounts. If you handle it right, it won't make you fat. Same thing with alcohol."

Hmm. I do like cake, so this made sense to me. And I do NOT believe in diets. I refuse to deny myself pleasure so I can fit into what society has told me is beautiful. I think this is how my friend sees the issue of alcohol. Our issues are paralell. He's not going to deny himself something he has no problem with just so he can be accepted by fellow Christians. He knows God loves him, with or without alcohol*, and I know God loves me, love-handles and all. When I realized this, I truly began to hate myself for being so misunderstanding and judgemental. I wanted to be like my understanding and merciful savior-and here I was being his opposite.

I had just passed the tollbooth on Highway 183 ,about thirty minutes away from my dad's, when my car started vibrating.

But then I remembered that my care is definitely not cool enough to have speakers that would shake my entire car.

Maybe it's the road. Maybe it has those little ridgy things.

But after about ten seconds of what turned into some nasty vibration, I squished by car up against the slim shoulder. I shimmied out of my car looking something like an awkawrd, brunette Marilyn Monroe (I was wearing a white dress and it was, or course, windy), and saw that I had not a flat tire-but a shredded tire.

Now, I know I said I know nothing about cars, but I do know how to fix a flat. Not saying that I would if I could get someone else to-but hey, I know how. Anyway, I had to whip out the AAA card and get some assistance.

Luckily, I had some very nice police officers escort me across three lanes of traffic and safely into a parking lot. They stayed with me until the Man Who Missed His Beer came.

The Man Who Missed His Beer came in his big AAA truck. His indian skin was covered in grease and his hands were calloused and worked. I was nervous he was going to be perverted or rape me or something. He was from the city, afterall.

But he was nice, and had a busy mouth.

"Man we're so busy today," he would say, flipping my shredded tire over his shoulder. "Twenty fucking calls a minute, too fucking busy."

This was something that I had never, ever seen. Someone cussing while smiling. Another thing I've learned from being around a prominintly baptist family is that cuss words are BAD and UNCOMFORTABLE. Cussing was a thing that uneducated and unchristian scary people did.

But he was smiling, and changing my tire as fluently as I brush my teeth. He seemed articulate.
"Man I miss my beer," he said. There were still little hints of his indian heritage in his voice. "I'm can't wait to go home and get wasted!"

But he didn't sound like an idiot. Intrigued and dead set on not showing my small town colors, I asked him, "Why do you think it helps?"

His hands stopped for a minute, his shoulders relaxed, and his eyes lifted from my tire to the sky in a curious way.

"Well, I don't really know," he said. "You don't think so much when you're drunk. Feels good."
He shrugged, and returned to changing my tire. I laughed nervously at first, hysterically later in my car. I asked him what his favorite drinks were. He listed them off; Smirnoff Ice, Budwiser, Jack Daniels...

When he left, I refrained from hugging him(another small-town Christiany thing to do), and told him thank you.

"Get drunk tonight! Enjoy yourself!" I found myself saying to this stranger who missed his beer.

I don't know why I said it. I don't know why I didn't argue with him and tell him that Jesus was better. I know that neglecting to argue with him was a good idea, but neglecting to mention God was not.

I know that now, but at the moment I was so overwhelmed by this new mentality of the Man Who Missed His Beer that I forgot my own. I wasn't prepared to share the gospel with him, and I can't blame that on being from a small town. Lately I had been so caught up in "What will my church friends think of me?" that I completely forgot that I had a bigger mission. I forgot that there were people who missed their beer.

So now every time I think of beer I smile. Not because I particularly like or dislike beer, but because my beer bubble has been popped, and that makes me happy. My faith is finally becoming less and less of what I've learned from parents and grandparents, and becoming more of my own. I think of beer and alcohol and think of the Man Who Missed His Beer and remember that he was smiling about beer at the same time that God was smiling about him. God doesn't care. He loves the Man Who Missed His beer, and I should've told him that. Next time, I will.

*This is saying that my friend is NOT abusing alcohol. The abuse of alcohol is something God cares about deeply. Not because it goes against one of his "rules", but because he knows it is not beneficial for his creation. God aint a dictator, he's a lover.

"Now take a look inside yourself and realize that we're all the same. We're all trying to make the best of a very bad situation."

-That Old Forgotten Street, Justin Trawick

It's a safari Colt! A SAFARI!

Oh, Keller Family. How beautiful you people are. Here are more of Colt's Senior pictures and family portraits.

Reader, I promise to make my blogs more interesting at some point. Things have been extremely hectic lately, but in a lovely way. Taking senior pictures, writing newspaper stories, studying for the SAT, taking extra courses to graduate early, trying to figure out senior invites....It's all just so very time consuming. But I love you, dear reader. And I
promise to try harder to make things more interesting.

This is the summer plan thus far:
Move out to dads after Europe trip (GASP! I hav't even told you I'm going to Europe yet!)
Read a ton of books
Re-read anything and EVERYTHING by Augusten Burroughs
Work at either STRUT or Dominican Joes Coffee shop
Continue taking wedding/senior/engagement/etc., portraits
(except for money this time, this stuff is time consuming)
Shop for dorm room stuff
SLEEP
Possibly begin working out. Possibly. haha
Learn photography type things from Dad
Annddd.....

That's all I got.

Well, I guess you can count possibly interning at Texas Monthly or RARE, even though both are highly unlikely since both are very competitive .
positions. But hey, it could happen
Oh goodness! How could I forget? Build my website! Duh. That's something I could talk about.

I really want to build my own website. No offense, but blogger agrivated the crap out of my and I need something a little more personal and professional. Ya know? So I'll be working on that after I get my long-awaited MacBook. Hoooooorah.


I'll also be able to finally go to some of Tyler's (the best friend) shows. He and his band (The Carl Wayne Band) have finally begun doing shows, and I might actually be able to go to some of them. Which is good. If not, they still might let me take their pictures. Which is even gooder. (Yes, I know gooder is not a word. I can't spell that great, but I'm not that bad.)

Okay. I'm tired. Here's two things you should visit tonight:

http://www.marvelousmaggie.blogspot.com/
www.youtube.com/turdskiandfriends

www.myspace.com/thecarlwayneband

HAVE A STUPENDOUS DAY!

A history of journals.

Over the past couple of years I've kept dozens and dozens of journals. I decided to go through them the other day, and found some quite hilarious things. I know you won't be able to read some of the text, but oh well. Enjoy:)

P.S. I FREAKING HATE BLOGGERS WAY OF UPLOADING PHOTOS. This took me three days to make. THREE. DAYS. If you read this, you should definitely comment so I know my hard work was worth it. hehe.

Maggie! Melany! Colt! Remember this song? Oh, how we loved it freshman year:)

Plans for my "coffee shop," The Red Door!

Bahahahaha. One of my very first dates.

Maggie-Hover. Laura-Cousin. Noble-Retard.

...what does that first sentance say?

Girls bible study in Jr. High. Anyone remember this?

DIMPLE BOY!

...no comment.

HAHAHAHAHAHAHA.

This was from eight grade when Chance and I broke up. I was one sad, sad girl.

Oh, mash. Havn't played this in a while.

This is why I always made 70's in math class in junior high. I DOODLED INSTEAD OF PAYING ATTENTION. Bad Mary, bad!

Magry Shivens! Mary Garvin+Maggie Shirley=Magry Shivens

Upside down love:)

Bobby.

College Possibilities: NYU. HAH! I wish.

Maggie has a five head!

The End.

Dear reader, I like eggs.

A little, at least. only scrambled though.

Since I am just too excited and frankly sick of my own writing and absolutely in LOVE with my friend Maggie's writing, I am going to make you read what she wrote about me, because it beats how I was going to explain yesterday.

"The phone rang.

I answered and a loud squealing filled my ears. After a few seconds, I realized whatever was squealing was actually saying words. Maybe even forming complete sentences.

"MAAAGGIEEEIAMSOOOHAPPYYYYY!" the squealing thing said.

As it turns out, the squealing thing was Mary, and she was happy that she is finally certain that she is going to ACU. She was giggling and close to hyperventilation as she told me all about it. All about the scholarships, all about her parents, all about the dorms, all about hanging out with Tyler, all about the tire on the side of the road that looked like an animal...

"I'm glad I didn't get coffee 'cause I would be CRAZY right now," she told me laughing.

It's comforting to me that she can reach even higher levels of insanity. The highest I've seen was, like, Level 12: Fat Cats Make Me Laugh, and that was a very frightening experience for everyone in the newsroom.

LEVEL 8: RANDOM BURSTS OF BUBBLY
I love you, Mary! And I'm so happy that you're only going to be thirty minutes away from me! And, of course, that you've finally figured out where you're going to college and everything is working out.
-Maggie."

In case you're an idiot, let me tell you what you should have learned from this OTHER than the fact that I'm insane.....

I'M GOING TO ACU!

This is a good thing for you, too, reader! No more blogs debating college! Oh how happy you should be. I'm even bored with my own blogs. Maybe now I'll actually have interesting things to sayyy.....

Until then, my friends are fabulous writers, so when I get too boring, you should definitely go read their stuff.

Oke doke. Now Everyone go read Maggies blogs!

http://marvelousmaggie.blogspot.com/

And Melany's!

http://acharminglittleplacetobitch.blogspot.com/2009/04/i-wish.html

And Colt's!

http://adeviousconfession.blogspot.com/

love love love.

Dear Maggie,

I love this picture of us. We both look fantastic :)
I would really like to start writing short stories for you people to make my blog a little more interesting, but for now, I simply do not have the time or energy, so I will just have to keep you updated on my life. Sound good?

Today was a a blessing wrapped up in pure absurdity. In order to graduate early, I must take 5-6 classes online: Government, Economics, two semesters of English, and a blow off class. Each of these classes was going to cost be $130. Well, today, I found out that this is completely unnecessary. I know this for fact not only because I double checked, but because Mitch Evan's said so, and that itself is good enough for me.

Mitch is one of those people that is simply a lazy genius. Mitch is not the type of lazy that would make you think, "Wow, that guy is so freaking lazy." He's the type of guy that makes you think, "Wow, why am I not doing what he's doing?" He has this odd knack for finding quite efficient and less time consuming ways to do everything. My art class and I have learned various things from Mitch, like how to get college paid for by being the Mascot, how to scam someone, how to write fake checks, where to buy everything cheap, and finally, and most importantly to me, how to clep out of Government and English 4 FREE.

"Hey Mitch, who's your government teacher?" I said during our 6th period art class. I had some questions regarding my ridiculous senior government class, and since he was the only senior in the room, I asked him. Plus he's Mitch, and knows everything.

"I don't have a government teacher. I took that crap online and got it out of the way. Took me three days." He said.

"What?! How much did you pay?"
"Nothin'. I took it through the school and it's some grant thing so it was free, and open book."
"Are you kidding me?!"
"Nope."
"Oh my God."
"Yeah. It's one huge test and it's open book, and if you get a 90 or above, you clep out of the course and get credit for an entire semester."

So basically, I was pissed. But thank GOD I'm going to be able to get a $100 refund for the government class I already enrolled in. Yahoo!

Furious, I stomped down the hall to find my counselor to see if it was too late for me to switch over to the FREE class instead of the $130 class. But she was nowhere to be found, as usual, so I went and asked the teacher who supervises the kids who take online courses. She showed me the course, which didn't look so bad, and then talked to the Vice Principal with me about enrolling me in the free class. I'll know tomorrow if I can take the free ones. Which would be great, because not only is it FREE, its waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay less time consuming.

I will also be talking to ACU tomorrow with my mom. She wanted to clarify how much money it will cost each month for me to attend, payment plans, things like that. Tonight I broke down the cost for her, but before I sign my letter of intent we want to make sure.

I never really realized how much work I'm putting into college, especially ACU. I'm really, really excited. If you do it right and want a lot of help paying for college, it's a lot of work. I like it though. It makes me take my whole life more seriously.

My (wonderful) boyfriend can't wait to go to college. He's in the Navy right now and has to work from 5am-7pm most days (which means he gets up around 3:30 am). For him, college will be like a vacation. I'm so happy for him. He also gets his school paid for, lucky freaking punk. He wants to go to Austin Community College and then UT at Austin. Man, if I had my freaking school paid for and was interested in film like he is, I'd go to one of the nicest, most expensive film schools there is. But nooooo. Someone just has to live in Austin. Punk. I'm so jealous. haha
I'm going to bed now. Wasn't this post interesting?!?! :(

Thank you Jacob and Kacee!

Jacob so kindly let me practice taking senior pictures on him. We spent three hours shooting today! Twas a bunch of fun, and I am now tired, so I'm going to bed. Enjoy!

Oh, the memories.

While making the Tyler blog, I had to get out some old notebooks for references. While I have them out I figure I'll copy some other quotes, too. These are anywhere from freshman year till now. Enjoy!
Does anyone remember the "Fill My Bucket" fiasco? Where if someone said something mean to you jokingly they had to say five nice things to 'fill your bucket'? Well, I apparently made Marcus and Britton fill my bucket. They made fun of my hair :(
From Britton:
"Your awsome
your kool
you have nice hair
your kewl
your not a lesbo."
From Marcus:
"Your kewl
Your cool
your kool
you have nice hair
your awesome."
I made him start over.
"Nice person
your cool
nice earings
nice shirt
kooler than me."

Much better, Marcus.
Speaking of Marcus....
I have tons of pictures drawn by Maggie of "Dimple Boy"

WAIT! MARY HAS JUST HAD A GENIOUS IDEA!

MAGGIE! This should be your cartoon next year for the newspaper! The adventures of dimple boy!!!! Oh, I'm smart.

This is from a church service with the amazing Brandon Hawk:

"We have churches on every corner, crosses around our necks, and Christian fishes on our bumpers. But is it all for protection? Because demons don't fall at the doorsteps of churches, but rather enter them. They do fall at the feet of Christ. Has anyone yet to realize that in each of us Christ lives? So couldn't demons fall before us? YES."

"blah blah blah blah blah."

"This morning you have an appointment with the most high God," Beltway Youth Pastor Jessie Davis said. "The God who made the whole Universe wants to meet with you this morning."


"You know a breakup is bad when you walk to school at 7 am with a carton of ice cream in hand and a chocolate bar in the other."


"Maybe I'll start a blog...Thomas has inspired me. Yes, I think I shall start a blog."

"Mikey, you're like a big coloring book."


You didn't really think I was going to go through a whole quote blog and not mention my boyfriend, did you? :)
"You're like my cute little energizer bunny."
"You're so cute. I'm going to send God a thank you card."
"I think about the first time I saw you and felt your calming presence. Your passion for people. That camera of yours. The heart inside of you that has so much purity, and the mind in your head that has only the best intentions."
"I got so bored after you went to bed last night that I pretended to go on secret missions with my gun."

"Dear St. Stephens,
Please friggin' accept me.
Sincerely,
Mary Garvin."

A game of MASH.

"I will marry Marcus, who is sterile. We live in a shack, with 0 kids, and a dog. I am a journalist, and will die 7 days after we marry."

"Suicide is not chosen; it happens when pain exceeds resources for coping with pain."

I have lots of lists in here. Like music lists.

"MY NEW CD!"
Eminem- Superman
Hey mama- Black eye Peas
Where is the love?-Black Eye Peas
Always on time- Ashanti
Delimma-Nelly
Hips don't lie-Shakira
Beauty in the breakdon- Scene Asthetic
Mama-Kanye West
Dirt off ya shoulder- Jay Z (I still love this song)
Texas Angel- Honey Brown
(Do note that this is like 7th grade, and I was still a little ghetto from my elementary years in Colorado)"

HOW I SHOULD HAVE PACKED FOR STUDENT LIFE CAMP:
Peanut butter, jelly, bread, knife. The food sucks here.
Non cute clothing/brand new shoes. (Mary, when the brocure says "Enjoy student life camp in the beautiful Colorado Mountains!" this seriously means that you will be in the mountains, not in the fabulous streets of Maryland. PUT SOME DANG ATHLETIC CLOTHES ON YOU FREAK! Love, Self.)
Small backpack, not your favorite ginormous leopard one, no matter how cute it is, it's too dang big.
LEAVE THE BOOKS AT HOME. You will not read them, dork.

BOOKS TO READ:
I take this man-Valarie Frankle
Empress-Shan Sa
A million little peices-James Frey
Bloodletting, a memoir-Victoria Leatham
An unquiet mind-Victoria Leatha
Dry
Running With Scissors
A Wolf at the table- All by Augusten Burroughs (my hero)

A very cool revelation to end on:

BIOLOGY------->FAITH? YES.
"How do we know then what is alive? What does it mean to live? Life is characterized by the presence of energy. Remember that as you determine what is living and what is not. Without energy, life soon stops." Sophomore biology text book (Holt Biology).

--If we do not move more in our faith, our faith, or the liveliness of it, could die. Movement is so important.---

"All living things can reproduce."
--If our faith is alive, it will reproduce more believers.--

MOVEMENT.

Meant. to. move.
MOVEMENT.
When it comes to uploading photos on here, I freaking hate blogger. I refuse to arrange this prettier. It
s 12:48 am, gotta give up in 5 hours. Nighty night.

Screw sleep. Who needs that crap anyway?

I've said for a long time I wanted a Tyler-inspired-blog, but have not had time to do it, so here goes.

Tyler is my best friend and has been for the past few years. We iz supah tight. He works at Wal-mart and always has funny crap happening to him, so I of course have been trying to write it all down. I think this stuff happens to a lot of people, but Tyler always presents it is really what makes it funny. I could say the same things and they wouldn't be funny at all. Enjoy.

"Chris, a guy I work with, needed any random farm animal to put on his land for tax purposes. And I just happen to know a place where a person can get free donkeys. Problem solved."

"So I'm housesitting for my aunt and uncle a while back while they're in Europe and I'm bored out of my dang mind so I decide to go drive around in the hill country. While doing so, I saw a bunch of goats on a hill. So I pull into this trailer park and ask this dude who's goats they are. He's this huge guy with a black sack slung around his shoulder, like santa clause, if he were a rapist. He says, "No, but do you want to help me put them back?" I was so bored, I agreed. I don't know if you've ever tried to herd goats, but it's like herding retarded cats...but I did it anyway."

"...so I'd been sleeping till noon everyday while housesitting, and since it was summer, I just slept in my boxers on the couch. When I woke up, I heard this female voice humming somewhere inside the room, I jumped over the couch to see my cousin's girlfriend, scared as hell, looking for her stuff. Apparently she had an extra key, and did not know I was there. So, obviously, my half naked self scared the hell out of her."

Oh, the sombrero stories.

"We're taking a porch break (from practicing with his band). The sun is in a bad place for my eyes, so I'm wearing my sombrero."

One time, Tyler was in a Hooters on a school trip eating lunch (if I'm not mistaken), wearing his sombrero and playing guitar. The manager liked it so much, he asked Tyler to play for the whole resteraunt. It's something weird and random, so of course, he did.*


"I was in Witchita Falls hangin out with some friends and we were bored as hell, and high on a sugar rush. So I said, 'Wanna get kicked out of Wal-Mart?" He said he'd like to see me get kicked out, so I put on a sombraro, paint a mustache on my face, and put a pancho on and grabbed my guitar and walked around Wal-Mart for a while humming mexican songs. When the manager finally asked me what was up, I just started screaming, 'No habla engles! No habla engles!'"


Tyler now works at Wal-Mart and watches random idiots just like him walk through his store every day.


"As I was walking down the aisle at work today, I heard this kid wailing from the aisle next to me. I peeked over and the mom was trying to comfort the kid and make him stop screaming, so she picked up this giant frozen fish and waved it in front of him. 'Look! It's nemo!'"


"Forget Who Wants To Be A Millionaire, the next contestant show is 'Who Wants to be on Tyler's iPod?'"


"So we invented a new game at work today. It's called, "Make fun of the dumb manager in a way that makes him feel like he's being complimented." It's not a very good name, but we're working on it."


"What can I say? I'm a dumpster of useless knowledge."


"I've seen kittens more intimidating than you, Mary."


Tyler's catch phrase: "Yay ego boost!"


"Mary, you'd make the worst super villan ever."


"Bwark!"

To this, I always say, "Awark!"


I also say this to him sometimes: "Artichoke! Don't smoke! Imma give you a poke! I hope you lose your remote! la la la la loke! Hey! Don't choke! I wanna coke! Hey Artichoke! Don't smoke!"

Oh, by the way, I call him Artichoke. We don't know why.


There's more, but we can't remember any right now. We say goodnight.

*I can't remember that story exaclty right, so it could be very close to fictional. Oh well, it's funny anyway!

Happy!

Happy happy happy! This is what I look like when I'm happy, in case you people who don't know me were wondering.

I have the GREAT possibility of going to ACU this fall! HOORAAYYY! At first I didn't really want to tell anyone about this, but I don't care. It's important, right? Anywho, I did not get accepted into Texas State (sad day).

I did not receive this information by mail, however, nor by e-mail.

I got so tired of waiting to know if I got accepted that my aunt Julie and I just marched right up to the admissions office and demanded to know what the decision was (in a nice and lovelier way, though.)

I saw a lady named Mary Something, and Mary Something said that my application had been "declined." I didn't freak out, thank God. In fact, I wasn't all that surprised. But I did want to know why. Who wouldn't?

Mary Something did not want to tell us why. So my aunt bluntly explained that we had driven four and a half hours to find out why, and wasn't leaving without more information. We desired detail, and detail we got.

"It was probably because of your grades. You didn't take any AP courses-well, you took one pre-AP course, but nothing after that. So it was probably that, your GPA, and low class ranking," Mary Something said.

(ATTENTION TO WORLD: GPA AND CRAP REALLY DOES MATTER. THIS SHOULD MEAN SOMETHING BECAUSE I AM SIXTEEN, AND NOT YOUR MOTHER. WHICH USUALLY, TO THE LIFE OF A TEEN, MEANS MORE.)

"Did they not look at my extra-curricular activities or anything? My essay?" I said.

"Well, they're required to, but they probably didn't take a good one after they saw your grades." Mary Something said. Ouch.

"You mean, it doesn't matter that she's been writing for the largest regional newspaper and winning state awards in journalism?" my Aunt said.

"Hmmm. Well, that doesn't sound right," Mary Something said, obviously confused. Or just playing dumb. "Let me check your file again."

"Yea, that'd be nice," I said, probably, though unintentionally ,sneering.

After a few raised eyebrows and a long wait, she told me to write an appeal. So, I'm writing an appeal. That's what I've been doing these past few days.

But here's the thing. Right now, ACU is throwing money at me and Tamara Long (ACU Counselor) has been doing absolutely everything she can to get me at ACU. She gave me her cell number, logs on to my FAFSA to help correct errors, and is getting me all sorts of crazy scholarships. With some other scholarships combined with the ones I already have gotten from ACU for journalism, I have about half of my total cost per year already paid for. This means that it will be cheaper, if not equal, for me to go to ACU than it will be for me to go to Texas State or Angelo.

The other thing I've realized is this: Texas State didn't even care about my application, ACU is giving me thousands of dollars for it. Texas State never returns phone calls, I have Tamara Longs cell phone number.

I have always thought that ACU was a better school, but for a while lost faith that it was going to happen since my SAT scores sucked. So out of Austin Community College and Angelo, Texas State was definitely the better choice. And when compared to ACU with no scholarships, if I get in with this appeal, Texas State is better because it's cheaper and close to Austin. And has a beautiful campus and really cool exchange program. I still like and love Texas State, but they don't care about me. I am a number to them. I feel like more than that at ACU, and I really like that.

Plus, that will come in handy when I need a ton of help in math and science or help picking things for my portfolio. If they're helping me pay for my education now, they'll help me later. That matters a lot to me. I havn't made my decision, but these are the things I've been thinking about. If I don't get into Texas State on the appeal, I'm definitely going to ACU. If I do get in, I have more thinking to do.

I could go back and forth all night, so I'm moving on.

I went on a really long drive out in the country yesterday to the bridge KaCee showed me. I blasted worship music the whole way and often got out to lay on my car singing to God in the sunset. When I finally got to the bridge, I found some pretty interesting things.

With my cell phone, camera, and a bottle of mase(?) is my hand like any paranoid photographer would out in the middle of nowhere, I set off to take some pretty cool photos.

I have more, but I don't want to upload them. Uploading pics on here sucks because it re-arranges everything and bla bla bla. Anyway, I'm going to bed now. Nighty night.

Brainstorming

This post is a little ironic because I'm in newspaper SUPPOSED to be brainstorming questions for my story, but instead, I'm brainstorming ideas for a tattoo/painting I may or may not have someday. If you haven't noticed the majority of my posts are like post it notes for me. I may or may not get tattoo, but in case I do, I need some reminders of what types of things I like (yes, I do forget). They aren't really for anyones benefit but mine. haha. My blogger is becoming a filing cabinet of to-do's. So here's my post it note/file for tattoos. Enjoy.

I love how the majority of the tattoos I like are exemplified by half-naked women. Awesome. BUT, this is my favorite tattoo so far. It comes closest to what I have in my head. I only really like the girl with the banner over her eyes. The flowers I would change to white and pink english roses (featured below) and I would put different words. I also like the little heart on her wrist. But the placing of the main tattoo she's showing us is almost exaclty where I'd want mine. That's one ginormous tattoo though. But I do likes it :) Sparrow on the right, me likey.

I loooooooooooove this tattooo....

Doves on the stomach

This is an extremely good example of what I do NOT want. CHEEESSSYYYYY!

Oh, Megan Fox. Pretty lady.

I pray to God my hair will one day be this long. I like these rib cage tattoos, but accoding to my wonderful boyfriend, they hurt like none other.

I wouldn't get this exact image, but I like the vines and rose.

Okay, definitely will not be getting an Obama tatto, but I like this banner style a lot.

Here comes the flower parade. I don't know which kind of flower I would get, but I'd like two or three big ones on my side.





These are my favorite, english roses. Like the detail on the side of the banner.

I definitely would like to try a monroe peircing :) and my nose maybe.

More to come, I'm sure.

This shall be my portfollio.

I HEART COLT

Colt the amazing photo editor came over today and helped me pick some peices for my portfolio. These are the really crappy internet versions of the ones he picked. I think he really picked the right pieces, don't you? Thank you Colt! Tell us what you think of our marvelous selection! Does the selection show a wide range of artistic or journalistic abilities that will showcase my abilities as a graphic designer and journalist? Comment for once! hehe:)

IM SO EXCITED I COULD SCREAM!

Okay, so, my dad is amazing. He just sent me an e-mail with all this cool stuff that TX state has to offer. He also somehow found out that an admissions decision has been made and that I will receive notification in 5-7 days on whether or not I've been accepted. YAYYY! I hope I am, but all this waiting really had me going crazy. I really don't know if I'll get in or not now. ANYWAY! Lets say hypothetically I do get in so I can tell you of all the exciting things he found!

Anyone who knows me knows me knows that I LOVE MARYLAND!, and that I am very sad I can not go to school there because it is too expensive. My dad has magical powers and a way of finding things on the Internet, and found out that TX State is a part of NSE, National Student Exchange. Under this program, as a sophomore or junior, I could study in MARYLAND but pay Texas State tuition because I'd technically still be a Texas State Student.



This all equals OH MY GOD, I'M SO FREAKING EXCITED!



I had four Tootsie Pops a while ago, that's probably why this is unusually exciting. That, and the school I want to go to in Maryland is THREE hours from my precious boyfriend. Three hours verses 22 is very awesome. And I love traveling, and I need to get my fix somehow, so YAYYYY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! Did I mention I could somewhat easily take a train to New York from Maryland?



Holy crap. I'm not even in yet, but I'm still really freaking excited.



Oh, did I mention I could also study in New York, Colorado, Hawaii....?



Hmmmm. Moving on. I'm too excited for this. I'm gettin' all shaky and twitchy.



I'm almost almost done with my online economics class. And after I finish my research paper for English 1, I'll be done with it, too. I still have to take the final exams for both classes, but that doesn't count. It should, but I want to celebrate right this minute, so that shall count later. I ordered my Government class and should start that soon, so hoorah! After that, I'll have one or two blow off classes to take, and, wallah! I graduate!



I made lots of calls today. I called Texas State and Angelo State to inquire about how to get on the newspaper staff. It was somewhat of an ego boost. They kept on saying, "I mean, we don't let just anyone write. You have to do a few sample stories, and then you might get published. And IF, IF you've been published before, your chances are greater of being published and then eventually on staff."



Hmm, too bad I've never been published. I mean unless you want to count being on the newspaper at school and doing photos, stories, cartoons, layout...and if you want to count the Abilene Reporter News stuff, I guess you could. haha. Anyway, enough of my ego trip.

That's the really, really cool thing about my school paper. You get lots of experience. Most of us take our own photos for our stories and even help with layout. Without even realizing it, we're beefing up our own portfolios.


Speaking of portfolios, I'm super excited about putting mine together. My dad has, again, been awesome in this department. He's getting me hooked up with his "photo guy" to get a professional one done. Personally, the only stories I think are even remotely good enough to put into a portfolio is Kirsten's story and Justin's. But that's just me. As for photography, pfft. I don't know. I like K.C.'s photo a lot, but other than that I'm clueless. Nonetheless, it'll be exciting.


I also called Texas Monthly and RARE to see if they wanted an interview, and if so, if we could have it this Friday because I could be in town for that. Texas Monthly said that they haven't even looked at their intern applications, so it'd be too early. RARE has yet to call me or e-mail me back. Apparently, Texas Monthly has about 300 applicants every year and the art department is most popular. Good thing I applied for both TexasMonthly.com and Art departments. If I don't get those I might start looking into some in California. I have a lot of family there I could stay with. Internships are very important, and I'm trying to get at least some out of the way when I can afford to have an unpaid job.


I decided that if I were to live in Austin this summer and have an internship, or didn't, I would apply at this store called "Lucy in disguise with diamonds." It's this huge, hilarious costume shop on Congress that would be a blast to work at (hopefully). It'd be interesting to see who comes in and buys what. Plus, it's on one of my favorite streets in Austin and in walking distance from my Dad's (where I would live, rent free). Other than that, I could work at a coffee shop, pottery painting place, or cool little fashionable stores. Or, oh my God, a bridal shop. haha That'd be great fun. Screaming women and mothers all day long. Woo hoo!

Okay, I'm tired. Nighty night.

Maggie's right. I have too many drafts.

So I'm just posting this without hesitation.
As summer nears, I am beginning to realize it is almost time for me to whip out the dresses. I am extremely excited, and decided I needed to start looking.


That, and I'm bored.


Once again I Googled. I am a big Googler. I found these sites:
Thisnext.com
asos.com
modcloth.com
















I'll continue this later.

The prefect pick-me-up-er

I have no idea if I didn't hat headline right, but whatever.


After a mildly horrible hour and a half of worry and confusion, I was in need of a good pick-me-up-er. It all came about after I called KaCee and pathetically asked to come visit her new kittens to stop my crying and couldn't because it was so late at night. I love cats, and even though my boyfriend hates this, they make me extremely happy. I might get a kitten if I go to community college and live with my dad (I believe it will add greatly to my happiness, which will be needed as I will feel dumb going to community college and living with daddy), and I wanted to amuse myself by thinking of what kind I should get. I'm kind of giving up on cats from the country because they seem to turn evil if over protective pet owners such as myself try to keep them inside. So, I thought, if I'm going to possibly buy a kitty (or sadly a dog), what kind shall I get?

I love fat cats. I realize that there is probably no particular breed of cat that will most likely to get fat, but you never know, Google can come up with anything. So I Googled, "fat cats". This is what I got: As you will see, I have given them all names.

My favorite, George.

Meet Iggy, a fat cat from Missouri.

This is Greg.

Louis.

Snowball. (He was found near a nuclear plant. No, I'm not kidding.)

BAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!

Then, I Googled ugly cats:

Right now, I am laughing hysterically in newspaper. I am literally crying and some what hyperventilating. Maggie, Melany, and Colt, and Mr. Lucas who just yelled at me (for my "giggling"), can all confirm this. Jerks.


I am calm now. My self pity is now over. I know you didn't enjoy this nearly as much as I did, but I hope you did enjoy it a little.
:)

Today was good.

So I'm pretty sure there are about 6 rain forests worth of paper living in my house. My mom and I are always receiving a whole bunch of crap mail and since we're both pack rats, it just kind of lays around. We don't throw things away because, what if someday we need that special offer on nose trimmers? It would be dumb to put outselves in such jeopardy.
The kitchen is the worst. It wouldn't be so bad if I didn't live in here (the computer is in our kitchen), but I do, so I'm always leaving my homework and mail in here. I think the world would be a lot better of if everything was communicated through e-mail. That way we could cut down on like, half the rain forest killing. Or, Obama could make himself useful and make junk mail and crappy organizations illegal and make every one's lives easier. Well, everyone but the crappy organization people. (P.S. the Obama thing is a joke, I really don't have any special opinions on politics these days. I am uninformed. Okay, I am informed, I just don't know what the truth is about any of it. Thus, I will make no opinion of him.)

So I can not even explain how anxious/nervous/annoyed/excited I am about this month. In this month I will (hopefully) know the following things for sure:
If Mikey can come visit me
If I got accepted to Texas State
If I got any financial aid
If I got any scholarships
If I got the Texas Monthly internship
If I got the RARE magazine internship
If I have to go to stupid community college
And last, but not least, where I will be living this summer.


Hmmm. Isn't it interesting that when we want to get something, we usually have to wait, but when we can give something, there's rarely a delay?

I'm excited to leave and be on my own and all, but I will miss Albany in certain ways. Like Brookshires. I love how all the people there treat you like family and if my friends are working, they always help me out to my car and ridicule my pink door handle. Yes, I will miss that. I will also miss Higganbotham(?). Because I am an idiot and rarely ever know what I'm doing, it's nice to have nice people working at hardware stores. I feel less dumb and more funny when I have to say, "So, I'd like to paint my car door handle pink. What kind of paint should I use?" Or like today, when I was at Brookshires, and this old lady was standing next to me in the fresh vegetable isle and I asked her, "Which one is the salancho?" and she laughed with me and pointed it out. I doubt it'd be like that at many other places. And even if it were to be like that, I'd be too shy to find out.

When I get to Austin, or where ever, or actually just anywhere in general, I really need to get somewhat over my shyness of men and pretty women. That sounds weird, so let me explain by another example:

On Monday I was at a UIL meet, and I was starving. It was breakfast time and I, of course, did not eat breakfast as we were out of cereal. When we got to the UIL meet that morning, I was extremely happy to find that they had massive donuts topped with chocolate and multi-colored sprinkles (my favorite). I wanted to get one, but was extremely intimidated by the pretty people behind the counter. There was one girl and two guys who looked like football players. Let me get one thing straight; I wasn't intimidated in a way that made me think "Oh my God they're prettier than me!" It was more like...these people are scary. I don't know what it is. It's just that littel shy part of me that's like "BAM! I'M SHY NOW!" But they were all very nice (and funny) when I finally got a donut after ten minutes of staring at Colt's, so I really need to get over myself.

The same thing happens when I go to Subway and there is one guy behind the counter. No one else, just one guy. Even if he's not "attractive" I still get all freaked out and run away. And I love Subway, to the point where I drive 30 minutes just to get it. So this should say a lot. Of course, after 30 minutes of dreaming of my ultra delicious turkey, pepperoni, black olive, and sweet onion sauce sandwich on honey oat bread, I probably wouldn't run away. But I still blush and get all nervous because I'm afraid they're judging me and my sandwich. Which is dumb, because judgemental sandwich makers just should not exist.

Well, none of that made sense even to me, so I'm moving on.

I love NCIS. It's so good! I literally cried when Kate died and Ducky had to do her autopsy. And then screamed when that dumb butt terrorist guy came back to kill the rest of them. Ugh, so repulsive. Did anyone see the one where the same terrorist snuck into NCIS headquarters by hiding in an autopsy bag? I wish I could write as good as the NCIS script people. Geniuses.

I didn't go to church tonight. I believe I did something way more useful to honor God with. I made dinner with my mom, and didn't get aggravated, mad, or annoyed/critical with her. I actually told her how my day was and how I watched Alyssa and Ari have a huge jewelry breaking cat fight yesterday. I hope we stay like this. I know our problems are all my fault. I shouldn't blame her for so much. I need to start looking at how much she does for me.

I'm really excited to be in college. I want to learn to be better. I'm so sick of not being taught anything (this excludes you Mr. Davis, you are awesome). I feel like all this year is is filling out worksheets and showing up to class. I'm not learning to be better at what I love, journalism and art. Art class is a total joke. Newspaper is my only creative outlet, but Mr. Lucas never takes the time to teach me anything, and when I tell him that, he says it's my fault. I'm pretty good at looking at it from both sides, and I know I have done absolutely everything to make myself a better journalist. He is helping in some ways. Like a few months ago, he asked this author, Mike Kearby, to read one of my stories. And I'm sure he's doing other things, I just wish he'd tell me how to adjust photos.

I got my prom dress back from the tailor's today. It FITS now! YAYYYYYYY! It's very pretty. I'm sure I'll post pictures on here at some point (if any of them turn out good).

Hmmmm. Yep. That's all.